An Invisible Prison
by supermegafoxyawesomehot303
Summary: I might look like a perfect teenage boy, but I have more problems than you know, starting with the fact that I'm not really Finn Hudson. And maybe I am trapped in Finn's body and mind, but Fiona is making her way out. Transgender!Finn
1. Chapter 1

**AN INVISIBLE PRISON:**

**DISCLAIMER**: I do not own Glee, nor any of the characters mentioned. I am not trying to imply that the actors, creators, or characters of glee have these gender issues. I am simply writing for enjoyment, and hopefully the pleasure of others.

**WARNING: **this story will deal with MtF transgender topics, transphobia, homophobia, and brief self-harm.

INTRO:

Have you ever felt completely out of place? Like you know there is somewhere else you are meant to be? I'm sure everyone feels that at one time or another. But have you ever felt this was inside your body? My body is like a cage. I am forced to stay trapped, in clothes that don't feel right, and hair that is too short, and a frame too tall, and the odds stacked against me in every way possible.

There are no words to express the disgust I feel with myself. I should have been perfect; hell, I was perfect. The quarterback of the football team, the male lead in Glee club, I had everything. But I had to throw it all away.

What if I told you I'm not who everyone thinks I am? Would you run away, like I had some sort of disease, or would you still be my friend? I'm sorry to have to ask, but I have lost a lot of good friends over this subject. Please say you'll stay by me?

I was born Finn Hudson, but that's not who I am. In my head, I am Fiona Hudson. In my mind, I am the head cheerleader, not the quarterback, and I challenge Rachel for all the solos in Glee. You guessed it, ladies and gentlemen; I am transgender. And this is my story.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 1:

My mother is a beautiful woman. Her hair fell just to her neck, and she had these sparkly eyes that made you trust her. I wish more than anything to be like her. That was what was on my mind as mom, Kurt, Burt and I sat around the table in our dining room. Burt asked me if I was feeling alright, and I just absentmindedly shrugged. Mom and Kurt were concerned as well, but I just shook my head and picked at whatever food was still on my plate.

After another seven minutes of worried glances, and I was making up an excuse to leave the room. I think I said something about practicing for Glee. Mom and Burt bought it; Kurt did not.

"What's wrong with you today Finn?" Kurt questioned three minutes after I left the dining room. My tall, awkward body took up my whole bed, but Kurt still found a way to sit next to me.

"Nothing," I grumbled for the millionth time that day. Kurt rolled his eyes and poked my shoulder.

"Come on Finn; tell me what's going on. Is it girl trouble?" As much as I loved Kurt, I didn't want to talk about this. But I also knew Kurt wouldn't give up when he wanted to know something. Reluctantly, I nodded; in a twisted way, it was girl trouble.

"Is it Rachel? Or Quinn?" Kurt fired questions. I just shook my head and buried my face into the pillow. After a long pause, Kurt sighed.

"You know what Finn? You have the same expression I had the first time I came out. Is there something you want to get off your chest?" Kurt sounded like he really wanted to help, and for a half-second, I considered. But then I remembered that I was Finn Hudson, and I had to stop being like this. I had to get a genuinely concerned Kurt to stop asking me questions before I was ready to give the answers.

So I handled this the only way I knew how; anger.

"Fuck you, I'm not gay," I hissed, rolling over and shoving my nose into my pillow case. The pleasant mix of whatever laundry soap was used, plus my shampoo calmed my frayed nerves. A quick huff was the only evidence he had heard what I said. The creak of my bedsprings as his weight exited followed by warmth disappearing from my side was my indicated he left. A deep sigh slipped from my chapped lips and I rolled over yet again.

My eyes traced patterns on the faded white paint of my ceiling as I whispered, "I'm not gay," over and over.

But what was I, if not gay? I mean, I had zero attraction to any female I had ever met. Rachel and Quinn were just experiments that didn't go as well as I hoped. But I had attraction to males, or one male in particular- Noah Puckerman.

His muscular arms, wonderful abs, and beautiful face, my best friend Puck was any girls dream. I had a significant problem though; Puck was my dream, but I was not born a girl. Did this make me gay?

It wasn't normal to worship your mom, fall for your heterosexual same-sex best friend, and like show choir more than football. To be honest, I hated football. I only did it because the coach said they could use my 6'3 frame, and I wanted to fit in.

"Fuck this; I am NOT gay," I hissed. Standing up abruptly, I knew what to do.

There was a simple cure to feeling like this, I thought as I made my way to the bathroom. Hidden in the top right door of the sink was a broken razor blade, with an edge so jagged I required stitches from touching it. But then again, my upper thighs were lined with rough scars for a reason.

I took my pants and boxers off, rolling my eyes at my body and clothing. Why couldn't I look like Quinn, or Rachel, or even - wait. Why was I comparing myself to all of these girls? shouldn't I want to look like Tom Cruise, or Kurt, or Mike Chang?

And as I drug the razor across the tender flesh of my inner thigh, wincing as the pretty ribbons of red flowed, my answer came to me.

I was a girl, trapped inside a man's body.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2:

Weeks went by where I was jumpy, unfocused, and even slower than normal. I stopped listening to anyone around me, with the exceptions of Puck and Mr. Shue. Rachel was convinced I was loosing my mind, and the rest of my friends didn't trust me to lead them to Nationals. Puck kept trying to tell people I was just stuck in a junior slump, and that I would come around the closer we got to our senior year. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

Kurt was the only one who seemed to think this was deeper than just being bored with high school, or stressed about nationals. But we had stopped communicating the night he accused me of being gay. I could feel his eyes on me though, attempting to crack the code to get into my head and learn my secrets.

Today was no different. I was sitting in one of the hard, red plastic chairs in the choir room, waiting for the rest of the group to show up. The only ones there were Sam and Mike, who were messing with the instruments. I sighed, and started picking at my nails. I wished they were painted a pretty shade of green, to match the shirt I was wearing. That's what I'll do, I thought, go buy some nail polish after school. Maybe if I just painted my toes, nobody would see it but me.

Grinning to myself, I watched my friends file in. Mr. Shue was standing by the piano, talking with Brad.

"Okay guys, this week's theme is a little different than most weeks…" Everyone groaned at Mr. Shue's words.

"But Mr. Shue, we have to practice for-" Rachel was cut off by Santana, who was so busy insulting her that none of us heard what Mr. Shue said.

"This week, I want you all to pick a song that has to do with your biggest insecurities…" Another collective groan, "And there will be partners. That doesn't mean you have to do a duet, you can each sing a song, sing one together, or sing two together. But you have to work with your partner to make this performance the best it can be."

My heart was thumping rather loudly in my chest. My biggest insecurity? Were there any songs about being transgender? The only song that played in my mind was Born This Way, but that wasn't really for me. And what was my partner supposed to say? Maybe I should just make up some other thing I am insecure about or something… but then it wouldn't be an authentic performance. I was lost in thought, but Mr. Shue's next words yanked me from my head.

"… And we will be drawing names from a hat to decide partners. Since we have an uneven number of Kids, the last person can either pick to do it on their own, or join a group to make three. Tina, you're first."

WHAT? We not only had to face our biggest insecurity, but we had to do it with a random person. I was praying that I would be last, so I could do it on my own. Tina went bravely to the front of the room and pulled a strip of paper out of a hat Mr. Shue was holding.

"Sam Evans," Tina said. Sam moved to sit with her, and Artie was called to the front.

"Mike Chang," Artie called out. Mike moved by Artie, and the boys high-fived. Mercedes picked her partner next, which was Brittany. Mercedes looked a little disappointed, but the two smiled at each other.

"Rachel, you're next," she moved to the front.

"Rachel Berry," she muttered awkwardly. Mr. Shue told her to pick again. The next three draws were people who were already picked. Finally, her partner ended up being Santana Lopez.

Quinn's pick was next. I wasn't sure who I wanted her to get. The only options left were Kurt, Lauren, Puck, and myself. I didn't want to be her partner, but I really didn't want Puck to be her partner. Unfortunately, life never worked that way.

"Noah Puckerman," Quinn called happily, throwing Puck a flirtatious grin. Puck smiled softly, taking his seat next to her.

"Finn Hudson," Damn it. I was one slot away from doing this on my own. I wondered who I would rather be paired up with; my step-brother, or an obnoxious girl I barely knew. Hopefully Kurt. For once, my hopes were answered.

"Kurt Hummel," I said, reading his name off the strip of paper. I took the chair next to him.

"I'll do this on my own, " Lauren told Mr. Shue.

"Okay. Get to work guys, you'll present your songs by Friday," Mr. Shue went back to talking to Brad, and voices began erupting around the room.

"So… we should probably figure out what our biggest insecurity is first…" Kurt trailed of awkwardly. I just nodded.

"Well… I guess mine would be about being gay. It's hard, you know, facing society or whatever…" He was looking at me rather oddly. I just nodded again. These were the first words we had spoken to each other in weeks. The air between us was cold and tense.

"Damn it Finn, tell me what is wrong with you! We are supposed to be brothers, and you're being all silent and cold, and a few weeks ago you were acting like you used to freshman year. What the hell is going on?" I stayed silent for a few long moments after Kurt's outburst. I felt paralyzed with fear. Should I tell him? What would he say? If there was someone I trusted to understand, it was Kurt. But then again, I still didn't know much about this subject myself. Finally, I made my decision.

"Well… Kurt, I… um, I have…. Issues with my, er, insecurity. I um… well, Kurt, I like guys, but I'm not…. I'm not gay, I am… I am transgender. I feel like a woman Kurt. Please help me," I looked wildly at Kurt. His face morphed into a look of understanding, and he flung his arms around me.

"It's okay Finn… I get it. don't worry, I'm here for you… And I know the perfect song."


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER 3:

The assignment was given on Monday. During Glee club on Wednesday, Tina and Sam were both ready to sing their songs.  
We decided to sing two separate songs. And I ll go first by singing Read My Mind by The Killers because my biggest insecurity is fading into the background. I never stand out in anything I do, and that bothers me. So here I go, Tina s voice was passionate as she started to sing.

"On the corner of Main Street Just tryin' to keep it in line You say you wanna move on and You say I'm falling behind Can you read my mind?  
Can you read my mind?

I never really gave up on Breakin' out of this two-star town I got the green light, I got a little fight I'm gonna turn this thing around Can you read my mind?  
Can you read my mind?

The good old days, the honest man The restless heart, the Promised Land A subtle kiss that no one sees A broken wrist and a big trapeze

Oh well I don't mind, you don't mind 'Cause I don't shine if you don't shine Before you go, can you read my mind?

It's funny how you just break down Waiting on some sign I pull up to the front of your driveway With magic soaking my spine Can you read my mind?  
Can you read my mind?

The teenage queen, the loaded gun The drop dead dream, the Chosen One A southern drawl, the world unseen A city wall and a trampoline

Oh well I don't mind, you don't mind 'Cause I don't shine if you don't shine Before you jump tell me what you find When you read my mind

Slipping in my faith until I fall He never returned that call Woman, open the door, don't let it sting I wanna breathe that fire again

She said I don't mind, you don't mind 'Cause I don't shine if you don't shine Put your back on me Put your back on me Put your back on me

The stars are blazing like rebel diamonds Cut out of the sun When you read my mind"  
That was amazing Tina! Remind me to give you more solos, Mr. Shue said as the clapping silenced. I smiled at her when she made her way back to her seat.  
Sam was up next. Well, I m Sam Evans, and I m gay. And this is Make It Stop by Rise Against, because I thought about killing myself over this before, and then I heard this song and realized it s not worth it.

"Woah, woah.

Bang, bang go the coffin nails, like a breath exhaled,  
Then gone forever.  
It seems like just yesterday, how did I miss the red flags raised?  
Think back to the days we laughed.  
We braved these bitter storms together.  
Brought to his knees he cried,  
But on his feet he died.

What God would damn a heart?  
And what God drove us apart?

What God could make it stop?  
Let this end.  
Eighteen years pushed to the ledge.  
It's come to this,  
A weightless step.  
On the way down singing,  
Woah, woah.

Bang, bang from the closet walls,  
The schoolhouse halls,  
The shotgun's loaded.  
Push me and I'll push back.  
I'm done asking, I demand.

From a nation under God,  
I feel its love like a cattle prod.  
Born free, but still they hate.  
Born me, no I can't change.

It's always darkest just before the dawn.  
So stay awake with me, let's prove them wrong.

Make it stop.  
Let this end,  
Eighteen years pushed to the ledge.  
It's come to this,  
A weightless step.  
On the way down singing,  
Woah, woah.

The cold river washed him away,  
But how could we forget?  
The gatherings hold candles, but not their tongues.

And too much blood has flown from the wrists,  
Of the children shamed for those they chose to kiss.  
Who will rise to stop the blood?

We're calling for,  
Insisting on, a different beat, yeah.  
A brand new song.

Whoa, whoa [x3]  
(Tyler Clementi, age 18.  
Billy Lucas, age 15.  
Harrison Chase Brown, age 15 Cody J. Barker, age 17 Seth Walsh, age 13.)

Make it stop,  
Let this end.  
This life chose me, I'm not lost in sin.  
But proud I stand of who I am,  
I plan to go on living.

Make it stop,  
Let this end,  
All these years pushed to the ledge,  
But proud I stand, of who I am,  
I plan to go on living"

The room was filled with people telling Sam that being gay was okay, and if he ever needed to talk, he knew where we were. I told him he was very brave for coming out like that, and he did great on the song. 


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER 4:

After Sam and Tina, Brittany, Mercedes, Artie, and Mike all performed as well. They did well, but not as good as Sam and Tina. Thursday was the day things got really interesting. The first group to sing was Rachel and Santana.  
First of all, after talking with Rachel all week, we realized we had the same insecurity. So we have decided to sing two duets, one of her choosing, and one of mine. Santana started off.  
Santana and I are both lesbians. We don t have feelings for each other, however. So, this first song is her choice - I kissed a girl, by Katy Perry. She dedicates it to Brittany, And Rachel dedicates it to Quinn, Santana finished as the opening bars of the song played. Quinn was speechless, but I think she had a thing for Rachel. She didn t say anything after their first song though.  
And for our second song, I chose Radical by Catie Curtis, And it is dedicated to the same people as previously mentioned.

"It's all right, we're gonna be fine But let's give my mama and my daddy a little time Cause I've been good up 'till now They see you and they think that I have changed somehow But I'm not being radical when I kiss you I don't love you to make a point It's the hollow of my heart that cries when I miss you And it keeps me alive when we're apart We go downtown, some people they stare But there are lots of people who really don't care I just want to hold your hand I don't feel like making some big stand Cause I'm not being radical when I kiss you I don't love you to make a point It's the hollow of my heart that cries when I miss you And it keeps me alive when we're apart It's all right, we're gonna be fine Even if this world is taking so much time And though I mind what people say Love is stronger than any words anyway And I'm not radical when I kiss you I don't love you to make a point It's the hollow of my heart that cries when I miss you And it keeps me alive when we're apart"

Those two did wonderful. Their voices sounded amazing together, and instead of competing, they were conveying all of the emotion of singing to the one they loved. Quinn still hadn't said anything to Rachel, but Santana was greeted by a pair of lips belonging to Brittany.  
"Great job guys," Mr. Shue said softly as they sat down. Quinn and Puck were up next. My heart beat loudly in my chest; what if they sang a love song? What if they realized they still had feelings for one another over the past few days? My internal thoughts were cut off by Quinn's soft voice.  
"So after Puck confessing his love, it made me think of mine," Wait, WHAT? What did I miss while internally freaking out?  
Quinn's singing started up, and I decided I should listen. Puck stood next to her, strumming his guitar.  
"Please baby can't you see My mind's a burnin' hell I got razors a rippin' and tearin' and strippin' My heart apart as well Tonight you told me That you ache for something new And some other woman is lookin' like something That might be good for you Go on and hold her till the screaming is gone Go on believe her when she tells you Nothing's wrong But I'm the only one Who'll walk across the fire for you I'm the only one Who'll drown in my desire for you It's only fear that makes you run The demons that you're hiding from When all your promises are gone I'm the only one

Please baby can't you see I'm trying to explain I've been here before and I'm locking the door And I'm not going back again Her eyes and arms and skin won't make It go away You'll wake up tomorrow and wrestle the sorrow That holds you down today

Go on and hold her till the screaming is gone Go on believe her when she tells you Nothing's wrong But I'm the only one Who'll walk across the fire for you I'm the only one Who'll drown in my desire for you It's only fear that makes you run The demons that you're hiding from When all your promises are gone I'm the only one"

Everbody began clapping, and Rachel jumped up and kissed her. Oh, so maybe I missed Quinn confessing her love for Rachel. But what did she mean by Puck and his love? Did Puck have feelings for someone else?  
He kept his spot in the front of the room, his guitar still in his arms.  
"I'm in love, okay? And this person... isn't your typical girl, but I know how she feels, even if she has never mentioned it. I know because she is my best friend... and because a certain someone figured it all out for me. This song is called Lola by the Kinks, and I chose it because the woman I love was born a man. I wish I had a little more time, because I would have changed the words to incorporate her preffered name, but anyway, here's Lola,"

"I met her in a club down in old Soho Where you drink champagne and it tastes just like cherry-cola [LP version:  
Coca-cola] C-o-l-a cola She walked up to me and she asked me to dance I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said Lola L-o-l-a Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

Well I'm not the worlds most physical guy But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine Oh my Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola Well I'm not dumb but I can't understand Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man Oh my Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola Well we drank champagne and danced all night Under electric candlelight She picked me up and sat me on her knee And said dear boy wont you come home with me Well I'm not the worlds most passionate guy But when I looked in her eyes well I almost fell for my Lola Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

I pushed her away I walked to the door I fell to the floor I got down on my knees Then I looked at her and she at me

Well that's the way that I want it to stay And I always want it to be that way for my Lola Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola Girls will be boys and boys will be girls It's a mixed up muddled up shook up world except for Lola Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

Well I left home just a week before And I'd never ever kissed a woman before But Lola smiled and took me by the hand And said dear boy I'm gonna make you a man

Well I'm not the worlds most masculine man But I know what I am and I'm glad I'm a man And so is Lola Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola"

When Puck finished, the room was abnormally quiet. There were broken claps, and a lot of stares. The only person who really clapped was Kurt.  
"Finn, that was for you," Puck said, looking me in the eye. I blinked, and did the only thing I could do. I kissed my best friend, in front of the whole choir room.


	6. Chapter 6

The kiss seemed to last forever. His arms circled my waist, and mine wrapped around his neck, drawing him close to me. We only broke apart because of Mr. Shue s awkward coughing.  
That was great Puck, really, erm, emotional Mr. Shue was at a loss for words. The rest of the group was being kind of awkward as well.  
Let s talk about this later, okay? Puck muttered, not moving his arm from my waist. I nodded, and he went to sit down in the chair next to mine. I smiled before starting the introduction to my song.  
This is not really the way I planned to come out as transgender, but I guess I don t really have a choice now I have never felt like a guy. And I don t feel like I owe you any more explanation than that. But, that is not my biggest insecurity. I am trying to figure out who I am, and that is very difficult, but that doesn t mean I am ashamed of it. I may be afraid, but I like who I am. No, the thing that scares me is love. Love freaks me out, almost to the point where I don t want to be involved in it. But my heart is full of love, love that I am dying to give away. So I picked the song Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls because I think what scares me even more than love is the thought of loosing love. Puck, this is for you. after my giant speech, I heard the band start playing my song.

"And I'd give up forever to touch you 'Cause I know that you feel me somehow You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment And all I can breathe is your life 'Cause sooner or later it's over I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming Or the moment of truth in your lies When everything feels like the movies Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive

And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am I just want you to know who I am I just want you to know who I am I just want you to know who I am"

Tears were streaming down my face by the end of the song. Puck s eyes were locked on mine, and his were shining with unshed tears as well. My whole body was shaking, and my breathing was coming in ragged gasps. I had just told the glee club my deepest secrets. And only a few people were clapping. Kurt, Puck, Rachel, Quinn, and Sam were all smiling and clapping. Santana, Brittany, and Artie looked supportive but confused, like they weren t sure what to do, but they weren t freaked out either. Mercedes, Mike, Tina, and Lauren all had varying degrees of anger, shock, and disgust in their expressions. Mike looked like he was going to throw up, Tina looked like someone had told her the world was going to end the day before her birthday, and Lauren looked like she was ready to punch the first thing that moved.  
I don t understand, Mike said firmly.  
What s there to understand? I questioned.  
How can someone be born to the wrong body? You were born a male, and you will always be one are you all going to support this? This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard, Mike was shouting by the end, looking incredulously at everyone else in the room. Puck, Kurt, Sam, Rachel and Quinn jumped out of their seats. Sam, Puck, and Quinn looked like they were going to beat up Mike, and Rachel and Kurt came to comfort me. I was sobbing rather hysterically at this point. What was happening? Mike was one of my best friends. The two of us has just played video games together a few weeks ago. When did I switch from his buddy to someone disgusting?  
Mr. Shue got Puck, Sam and Quinn to settle down, all three coming to comfort me with the other two. But the nightmare didn t end their.  
I m with Mike. This is unnatural Finn. This isn t a real thing, you re just trying to get attention. Tina said bitterly. Mr. Shue has to get in front of Tina to stop Rachel and Santana from attacking her. Puck had his arm around my waist, Kurt had his arm around my shoulder, and Quinn was holding one of my hands. Rachel and Santana were making their way into our circle at that point too. Sam was standing in front of us like a guard dog, looking fiercely at the unsupportive group, still seated in their hard, red plastic chairs.  
This goes against God, Finn. Sam, Quinn, Rachel, how can you stand for this? What would your parents think? Mercedes voice was heavily disapproving. My parents would be proud of me taking a stand for something I belive in, especially to help a friend, Sam hissed at the dark skinned girl.  
And I don t know about you parents, Mercedes, but I am sure my dads wouldn t have a problem with Finn, Rachel snapped.  
I have a problem with this, was all Lauren said. Nobody bothered to respond in words. Artie and Brittany had made their way to us. My friends stood in a semi-circle around me, facing my new enemies. All at once, Tina, Mike, Mercedes, and Lauren gathered their things, and left the choir room. 


	7. Chapter 7

"I don't know what to say guys. I don't have enough information on transgender people to know what to say… have you talked to your parents yet Finn?" Mr. Shue began speaking with me after I stopped crying.

"Yeah, Burt and my mom were really cool about it. They told me it was a shock, but that they weren't disappointed or upset. And my mom said she always wanted a daughter, so she was looking on the Brightside, I guess."

Mr. Shue and I were sitting in chairs in the middle of the floor, facing each other. The rest of my supporters were sitting in the red chairs behind me.

"Good. I'm sorry I cant be more help to you, but like I said, I don't know much about this… how about I do some research with Miss Pillsbury, and we'll get back with you. Class is done for the day." Mr. Shue looked incredibly tired.

"Thank you, Mr. Shue," I said as I grabbed my backpack. My friends and I all decided to go back to my house to talk more about everything. Mostly, they were curious as to why I felt this way, what it was like, and what they could do to help.

"So, I want to know what your female name is?" Rachel was the first to ask as we sat around my living room, eating pizza, halfheartedly watching a movie, and mainly chatting.

"Well… promise you guys won't laugh?" I looked at every face in the group. Sam, Artie, Brittany, and Santana all nodded. Quinn and Kurt murmured their agreement, and Puck and Rachel both said 'I promise'.

"Okay… my name is Fiona. Fiona Hudson." there was a little bit of silence, and then Puck pecked my cheek.

"Fiona is a gorgeous name. Do you want us to start calling you that?" he asked. I nodded quickly, loving the idea of finally being able to be myself.

"And I am assuming you want to go by feminine pronouns as well?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, if… if you guys don't mind…" I stammered. This was too good to be true.

"Well of course we don't mind, Fiona." Artie said, trying out the name for the first time. Kurt, Burt, and mom had started slipping it in here and there, but I was ready for them to completely drop Finn, because that wasn't my name. My heart swelled at the words coming from Artie's mouth. Fiona really was a great name.

"What about clothes?" Santana questioned.

"I talked to my mom about that. She said I could start by wearing them at home, but she wants me to see a therapist before I go publicly as female," I replied. The group nodded.

"Can we take you shopping… when you're ready?" Brittany asked. The other girls nodded.

"That would be so awesome," I grinned at my friends, glad that they were truly here for me. And even though I lost a few, I found out who my true friends were.

Soon after that, they started to leave. Quinn and Rachel left first, followed closely by Santana and Brittany. Artie left next, and then Sam. Kurt left with Sam, and I secretly hoped they would hit it off; they looked good together, and I knew they both had a bit of a crush on each other. Finally, it was just me and Puck left.

"How do you feel about all of this?" I asked. We were sitting on the couch together, and he had his arm around my shoulders.

"I've known you were a girl forever Fiona. I don't know how, I just did. You've always been my best friend, and not just because we both played football and liked to sing, but because we had this connection. And I've always thought you were the most beautiful person I had ever met. I am completely comfortable with how you are," Puck smiled at me. I was thrown off guard by this side of Puck. I was used to my badass best friend, not some sweet, charming guy who wanted to protect me.

"And how do you feel… about me?" I asked, not having the patience to wait any longer. I had to have him elaborate on what he said before he sang that song.

"I love you. And it doesn't matter if you are a boy or a girl, black or white, rich or poor, Finn or Fiona, the quarterback or a cheerleader, or just some person in glee, because I don't care. I just love you, as long as you're not a lesbian," we laughed, and he leaned down to press a kiss to my lips.

"I love you too, you know. I have forever," I whispered to him. He smiled and kissed the top of my head.

"Well, you do know where that leaves us, right?" He asked me. I just looked at him curiously. He took my hand, looked me in the eyes, and asked, "Fiona Hudson, will you be my girlfriend?" I answered him with a kiss.

Maybe the world was an awful place, full of people who hated you for simply being you. And maybe nothing ever turned out the way you hope. And sometimes, your mind or body can feel like a prison, and everything just hurts. A lot of the time, you'll lose good friends because of something you do, or how you are, or just by being honest. But there are always good parts too, parts that blind you so all you see is the light. There is a way to break out of that invisible prison, and you will always have friends that love you. I realized all of this, as I sat with my boyfriend and watched movies while he stole kissed during the slow parts. I realized this when my mom took me to my therapy sessions, and I realized this when I got to dress like a woman fully for my first day of my senior year of high school. And eventually, I'll fix the parts of my body to fully reflect Fiona, but for now, I am comfortable with what I am doing. Maybe I started my life trapped in Finn's body, but Fiona is slowly making her way out.


End file.
